Farewell To The Old Ways

 2020 is finally, mercifully coming to a close. This is a good time to reflect o the lessons we’ve learned this year that will help us in the future. After all, we tend to learn more from our struggles and failures than from our victories.

I have to say that the phrase “because we’ve always done it this way” is one of my least favorite phrases. I have always valued improvement and innovation. It seems to imply that rocking the boat is not pleasant, even when issues are dealt with in the old way or innovative new ideas are presented.

The fact is that sooner or later, all boats get rocked whether the issue arises from within or if it is forced by outside circumstances and catches us all off guard. 

These challenges have forced people and businesses to discover if they have staying power when faced with inevitable change. 

Even if you are running the world’s best repair shop, you may not have a viable business today. We have had to reluctantly face the reality that one of the few constants in life is change and it requires us to become adaptable.

2020 forced countless individuals and businesses to revise their entire lives and business models, making what would have taken years’ worth of change in a few short months in response to an existential threat.

Most restaurants reinvented themselves by offering upscale takeout and delivery and expanding to outdoor seating.

Qantas, the Australian airline, designed a “Seven-Hour Flight to Nowhere” and it sold out in 10 minutes!

The global scientific community leveraged new technology to bring multiple vaccines to the market at a record timeline. 

Doctors, who have been historically frustrated at not being compensated for consults with patients outside their office, began video consulting and getting reimbursed. This is a change that kept people safe and saved unnecessary trips to the doctor’s office. This method will most likely expand after the pandemic for many. I think it has been long overdue. 

Nonprofits switched from in-person charity events to virtual fundraisers and this provided the opportunity to expand beyond their geographic market. These events netted more money by saving the huge costs of holding fundraisers in person. 

Business leaders who had previously stated that remote work could not work for their businesses ended up running 100 percent remote businesses that functioned well and, in some cases, improved. The future of remote work has finally arrived!

As 2020 comes to a close, we shouldn’t overlook the fact that many people and business were devastatingly impacted by COVID-19. The point is that, despite this, I have seen that the people and business that are surviving, and even thriving, are the ones who accepted the new reality and saw it as an opportunity to innovate and make overdue changes. I feel that, after 2020, we will have a new appreciation for things we took for granted.

Those who cling to the past way it had always been done may be the ones that will struggle the most. 

Why Laughter Is Sacred

 Our sense of humor is one of the most powerful tools we have to make certain that our daily mood and emotional state support good health. Laughter and a sense of humor are good for our emotional, physical, and spiritual health.The ability to laugh at our own mistakes is associated with mental flexibility and the ability to shift perspective. This can be an invaluable tool to leading a more satisfying and fulfilling life.

Fortunately for me, in the past 5 or so years, I have found myself participating in this ancient women’s ritual of being together, of belly talk, women talking from the guts, telling the truth, laughing themselves silly, feeling enlivened, going home again, everything better.

The positive relaxation effects can last for up to 45-minutes after a bout of good, hardy laughter. When we laugh, endorphins are released into the blood stream. These natural pain relievers promote a sense of relaxation and wellbeing.

I am guilty of having sat in someone’s kitchen or an outdoor cafe, shrieking and pounding the table until I have practically lost all muscle control. I am proud to admit my friends and I have tried out countless stories on one another and literally laughed like dogs.

Experts say that deep diaphragmatic breathing stimulates the cleansing of the lymph system by creating a vacuum effect which pulls the lymph through the bloodstream. This increases the rate of toxic elimination by as much as 15 times the normal rate.

The act of laughing decreases the secretion of epinephrine and cortisol. It reduces stress, promotes relaxation and improves circulation. Deep belly laughter is positively linked to the lymphatic and immune systems.

When we laugh, our brain releases endorphins, interferon-gamma (IFN), and serotonin. These are nature’s own feel good chemicals and are responsible for helping to keep our mood uplifted. Our mood in turn has a contagion effect on those around us.

When we are happy we attract good vibrations from others. If our mood is upbeat we are empowered to make more positive choices when confronted with life’s challenges.

Laughter allows us to entertain the absurd and imagine alternate possibilities. It stretches our imaginations and helps us to see things from various angles. It allows us to visualize situations in a more realistic and less threatening light.

By creating psychological distance laughter allows us to feel safe when confronted with anxiety provoking life situations like the one we are currently going through. Laughter allows an individual faced with an otherwise overwhelming crisis to relax and see things from a different perspective.

Laughing together with other people fosters emotional connections. It improves co-operation, communication and romance. A 2015 study found that laughter subconsciously increased our willingness to disclose information to others.

Various studies have found a correlation between laughter and positive patient outcomes, reduced hostility in schizophrenic patients, lower levels of psychopathology, and positive provider-patient interactions.

The bottom line is that no matter how you look at it, laughter is good for us.

A laugh seems to reach both far and deep into the psyche, shaking all things loose, playing with our bones, and making a delightful feeling course through our body.

It is said to be sacred because it is so healing. It is exciting and causes waves of pleasure. It is not one-dimensional, laughter is something we share with one-self as well as with many others. It becomes a medicine for the tough times and a strengthener for later.

Laughter lightens, realigns, reorders, reasserts our power and strength, laughter causes health. When laughter makes people glad they are alive, happy to be here, more conscious of love, when it lifts their sadness and severs them from anger, that is sacred.

Stepping Out And Untying The Knots

I started running late in life and wished I would have started younger but, as it turns out, there’s no need for speed. I was elated to find out that a long, head-clearing walk brings many of the same benefits — to body, mind, and spirit — as a jog or a sprint.

Since stay-at-home mandates started in March to curb the spread of the coronavirus, many people have complied by spending more time on the couch.

Fitbit, the company that makes smart activity trackers, shared data soon after showing that users of its devices across the U.S. were suddenly taking 12 percent fewer steps per day, on average, than they had during the same period in 2019.

It seems that since then, however, many of us have gotten off our couches and started going for walks again. It’s a safe way to exercise in fresh air and reconnect with ourselves and others.

Science backs up just how good this feels:

“Getting our steps in”, as we love to say, not only improves cardiovascular fitness, muscle tone, balance, and blood-sugar regulation. It also protects long-term cognitive function, reduces depression, and helps us think more creatively.

A study found that regular walkers were significantly better than sedentary people at finding innovative ways to solve issues, both while walking and immediately afterward. This is because the movement appeared to increase divergent thinking. So it counts as exercise and comes with the same positive- and potentially formative- benefits.

Considering that so many of us have been working from home this year, curled over laptops perched on coffee tables and kitchen counters, physical therapists are hearing more complaints of back and neck pain.

Gratefully, walking is an efficient way to undo the knots, both physical and emotional, that we twist ourselves into.

Walking with your shoulders back and your head over your shoulders will help your breathing and your posture. It can also improve digestion, since slumping forward increases pressure on the abdomen, which pushes stomach acid upward, potentially leading to heartburn. You can even work yourself up to a brisk clip, arms swinging at your sides, and you’ll feel calmer faster too; escalating your pace reduces stress hormones and increases the flow of feel-good endorphins in your brain.

Walking twice a day, for about 10 minutes out and 10 minutes back, will automatically put your body in better balance and clear your head. Think of it as a great way to mark the start and end of your day.

A good goal is actually one that’s relative to your starting point. Researchers found that for people getting a low number of steps per day (around 4,000 or fewer), taking just 4,000 more significantly reduced their risk of premature death from all causes.

Adults should aim to move more, sit less, and take more steps per day as their health allows. Using a step-logging device — whether an app on the phone, a smartwatch, a digital tracker, or an old-school pedometer — makes it easy to clock them, even while doing yard work or striding across the kitchen as you cook.

Tuning into your environment is another way walking can make you feel more centered and whole. Research shows that tramping through nature helps reduce stress, anxiety, and depression, and improve concentration.

If you haven’t strutted your stuff in a while, or want to get in on the action, lean into this low-impact, all-ages exercise, and unlock the upsides of hitting your stride!

Why You Should Prioritize Your Pals

I like to think we have lots to thank our friends for, from stepping in when we don’t have a pet sitter, to being there when the going gets tough, to listening to every detail.

Research reveals that these reliable companions do more than just have our backs: They can make us healthier.

A study found that young adults that had large circles of friends, were able to tolerate physical pain better, because they had higher levels of endorphins, the body’s feel-good chemicals.

Friends bring benefits later in life too. A 2011 study by Rush University Medical Center, in Chicago, concluded that the rate of cognitive decline was reduced by about 70 percent in socially active elderly adults, compared with those who socialized less often.

For older adults, supportive friendships have been found to be a stronger predictor of health and happiness than relationships with family members and spouses. We tend to spend leisure time with friends, while more obligatory relationships can often lead to mixed emotions and even stress.

In fact, going at it alone is now being seen as a real and quantifiable threat. Here’s the shocking part for me — experts say that the lack of social connections carries the same risk for premature mortality as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, and exceeds the risk associated with obesity and physical inactivity.

It’s actually straightforward science. We are social animals. When we are around others that we trust, we feel safer. By contrast, feeling isolated puts us on high alert, which can interfere with sleep, raise our blood pressure and levels of the stress hormone cortisol, even rev up inflammation.

Time with friends provides a unique kind of emotional support. Unlike family or coworkers, friends choose to be in our lives. When they show up for us, it is incredibly validating. It helps us feel appreciated for who we are.

The sad consequence? A 2018 Cigna survey states that nearly half of Americans suffer from feelings of loneliness.

What is most important is how you feel about the relationship: Are you supported? Will they pick up the phone in the middle of the night? Those are the ones worth investing in. And those investments should be safeguarded.

I say we need to take these relationships just as seriously as we do diet and exercise. In other words, make like a middle schooler, and put your peeps first. 

Overworking, Overdoing & Underliving

They say the past is a foreign country. That certainly applies to the world of work. The old days of 9 to 5 shifts and three-martini lunches seem as decadent as the lives of the late Roman emperors. It’s hard enough to switch off in your free time these days, never mind during office hours!

The mid-twentieth century and the present are, technologically speaking, light-years apart.

Professionals have never been so stressed and sleep-deprived. They’re less happy, less productive and staring down the barrel of burnout.

So, what is behind our ever-increasing work lives? Let’s rewind to 2008. The economy was in freefall, and companies were scrambling to adjust to harsh new realities. Most companies only survived by downsizing their staff and restructuring workloads. The result was fewer people with a lot more than their fair share of responsibilities. Sound familiar?

Enter the smartphone. The first iPhone was launched in 2007. According to a study in the MIT Technology Review, the iPhone conquered 40 percent of the American mobile phone market within just a couple of years. Amazing when you consider that it took computers fourteen years to get anywhere close to that.

The problem is that smartphones don’t just make life more convenient and fun. This means you’re always on standby mode. Your work is never more than a click away.

According to a study by the American Psychological Association, 33 percent of all Americans suffered work-related stress in 2013, while 48 percent claimed that their stress levels had increased over the last 5 years.

Between 60 and 90 percent of our trips to the doctor are stress-related.

I find that most of us accept stress as a fact of life and try to put a brave face on. When we finally burn out or get seriously ill is when we start considering changes.

We are overworking, overdoing and underliving. So what can you do to beat stress?

Practice mindfulness — a quick mindfulness method involves nothing more than focusing on your breathing. Take ten deep breaths, follow with a pause, and you’ll already feel a lot better.

Meditation — this requires more practice but it’s an invaluable anti-stress tool. This is not only good for your mental well-being — it’s also good for your physical health. A Harvard Medical School study showed that regular meditation can actually shrink the size of the amygdala and counteract stress.

Plan your day to minimize stressful experiences

The best way to minimize stress is to develop a long-term anti-stress plan. You can start by working out a supportive daily work rhythm. This can involve getting up earlier to free up time to go over your day’s responsibilities. This gives you the advantage to think through your tasks without losing focus or worrying about what’s coming up later. You won’t always pull off your ideal work rhythm. You’ll have to be flexible and roll with the punches.

Exercise is a highly effective stress remedy

This doesn’t necessarily mean you have to join a gym. Simple rhythmic and repetitive movements like walking, jogging, cycling, dancing or even doing some yoga poses can significantly reduce stress.

Movement purges stress hormones from your body. It also has psychological effects. Focusing on your body for a few minutes is a great way of getting out of your head and disrupting those obsessive thoughts that go hand-in-hand with stress. Try out different types of exercises and see what works for you.

Visualization is a powerful stressbuster

It’s a good idea to develop some cognitive strategies to quiet your mind. One is to “be in the moment”. Because stress is all about worrying about the past or the future, we need to learn to appreciate the present. Push back those anxiety inducing thoughts to the back of your mind. Make a conscious effort not to zone out and instead direct your attention to what you’re doing. The best part is that you can start practicing this kind of mindfulness without making any changes to your routine.

Visualize stress-free success. Ask yourself what you want to achieve and then concentrate on what it is you need to do to pull that off. This is a great way of pushing anxieties out of your mind and really focusing on the things that are in your control — this is a guaranteed stress reliever.

Good news! Stress is not inevitable or inescapable. Try some of these stress-relieving strategies and you’ll be amazed at what a difference a couple of minutes of mindfulness or a quick walk around the park can make in your life.

A Generation of Excess

I’ve had this thought rattling around in my head for quite some time. Lately I’ve been noticing how so many people live a life of excess — especially the younger generation.

Excess food, excess weight, excess time on the internet, excess stuff in the house, etc. Excess seems to be a new norm.

I think about the qualities that permeate our lives but can never be in excess. Love, giving, generosity and humor all seem to be around us, but we do not glorify these. No, for we choose to pursue excess because it fills a void in us.

I don’t think the world was not made to just house, clothe, feed and adulate the egocentric individual. It seems many excessive (narcissistic) individuals can think only about their thoughts, obsessive needs and activities. Helping others, being responsible for their deeds and failures, appears to be beyond them.

By cutting down their excesses, these people may come to realize what their unrealized fantasies are about.

Success is learned from the society we live in, the press is constantly pushing advertisements upon us and cheap fiction and films that all suggest a life of luxury and a ‘’pursuit of happiness,’’ provided we are all winners.

We’re so busy filling our head with stuff — worrying about everything we may have forgotten to remember — it seems we can’t even be content to listen to our own thoughts for five minutes, or just be content with our surroundings as we walk down the street.

Things are also faster and more readily available than ever before.

It seems we always want more, and we want it faster — whether it’s being expected to answer work emails at 4 in the morning, or achieve that dream body with a workout that lasts just 20 minutes.

It has become ingrained in us that more is better. More wealth, more clothes, more bedrooms, more love. It is a ‘more’ that is now is taken to an extreme level, the values that a simpler life offers are now endangered.

I am striving to be at peace with what I bring to the world, how I treat others and my understanding of what is achievable. I’m not striving for more. I’m striving for better. I want to get better at my work, and better at writing, and better at saying no.

It think the ultimate danger of this life of excess is that we get to the point where nothing is ever enough. It seems most of us are searching for a level of thrill that is never quite satiated. Reckless, meaningless behavior results as we search for the same level of thrill, never quite satiated.

We are so busy striving for the next thing that we fail to appreciate what we’ve got right in from of our noses. A healthy family, a roof over our heads. The ability to laugh, money to buy food. The love and trust of others.

I would be naïve and dishonest to state that it’s as simple as this but, I ask myself, where does it end? When will it be enough? I know it’s not as simple as this, I would be naïve and dishonest to state that it was, because then no-one would ever go anywhere or achieve anything, but where does it end? Where is the enough?

I’ve been much happier since I decided to demand less of myself. My focus has shifted on making time for things that make me a better person. I’ve been told that my radiance in all other areas improved as a result. If we keep demanding so much of ourselves we’re going to just continue to stretch ourselves until we combust — and then what happens?

This doesn’t mean I have regressed or become a recluse, but I have learned that it’s ok to say “no” to things that don’t align with my priorities. I’m nicer to my friends, more focused at my work, and more appreciative of the world around me.

My Social Media Experiment

Facebook was founded in 2004, and became popular among children and adolescents a few years later. My relationship with Facebook began, not by choice, in 2011 for the purpose of promoting myself as a Realtor.

Although I can’t say that my presence on social media improved my business in any significant way, I realized that social media is an undeniable force in modern society. From giving us new ways to come together and stay connected to the world around us, to providing an outlet for expression. Social media has fundamentally changed the way we initiate, build and maintain our relationships.

Nearly 50% of the world’s population uses social media daily, and that number is only expected to grow. Social media is, and will remain, a crucial way for marketers to reach their audiences.

However, it’s difficult to ignore the potential negatives.

Being constantly connected reduces our quality of life, and can potentially harm us. Doing so interrupts our work, our time with friends and family, and even the time we should be using to rest.

Social media can also expose us to online bullying or spark feelings of inadequacy if we feel our lives don’t match what we see in our timelines. The urge, and sometimes pressure, to share the best of our lives online and keep tabs on everyone else can prevent us from enjoying life in real time.

I will be more conscious about when and how I use social media from this point on. Although I had enriching interactions with friends and family through these platforms, I realized it was taking up too much of my time, or sometimes affecting me negatively, so I made the decision to go “off the radar” for a month as an experiment.

The first morning was the most difficult — resisting the urge of the “infinite scroll” was powerful. When did I become convinced that social media was my only connection to the outside world? Would anyone miss me?

I replaced it with a morning exercise routine followed by making sure that my emails and texts were under control and off I went with the rest of my day. All my notifications were turned off so I was not interrupted by any bells and whistles. This was a sizable contributor to more productive days at work and at home.

Research has shown that social media use is associated with lower self esteem over time. I thought I would suffer from “digital loneliness epidemic,” which focuses on the global rise in depression and loneliness as it correlates to social media use.

With each passing day, I found myself feeling further and further away from it. I was expanding, evolving and finding new ways of being happy and peaceful.

I learned that, with the development of social networks, the time I used to spend in front of the computer screens had significantly increased. This had led to the further reduction of intensity of interpersonal communication both in my family and in the wider social environment. Although social networks enabled me to interact with a large number of people, these interactions were, for the most part, shallow and cannot adequately replace everyday face-to-face communication.

As it turns out, it seems no one missed me. I have to admit I miss posting my photography and receiving flattering feedback, but I no longer see social media as a means of catching up but as a way keeping up and there is a big difference.

Having something to look forward to is a powerful mood booster. Many people look forward to scrolling through social media. In my case, if that something is a trip, I’m literally jumping for joy.

This doesn’t mean that I will delete all my social media accounts. Like most things in life, moderation works in this scenario, too. I will be conscious about when and how I use social media. If I think that it’s taking up too much of my time, or affecting me or anyone else negatively, I will make the decision to reduce how often I go online.

I will return to my mundane life infused with new information and animation. My intention going forward will be to create and share social media content that has the power to positively impact the lives of the people who follow me. 

The Corner Office Redesigned

 

When working in a traditional company downtown, one can easily spot the superstar professionals. They’re the ones with the corner office on the top floor and a personal assistant, and they strut around in the expensive designer suits.

When you work from home this may look completely different. The term “corner” could be referring to a corner of your living room, and the power suit might very well be a pair of sweatpants.

Working from home sounds like a dream to a lot of people. No commute, snacks at hand, and no chatty colleagues at the water cooler. But this freedom comes with additional responsibility. There is even a struggle to remain productive.

My friend Laura got her first taste of working from home during the pandemic. At first, she worried that she wouldn’t be productive while away from the office. But she found the opposite to be true. She got more done.

Although, for most of us, the traditional work week is 40 hours, those hours don’t correlate with much of an outcome. Let’s face it, we’ve all spent days sitting at a desk doing nothing, merely because it’s expected. We have to ditch the time sheets and evaluate our performance based on what we actually do.

How much happier are people who work from home?

As it turns out, there are stats on that. A survey from TINYpulse, a firm that studies employee engagement, found that remote workers score an average of 8.1 on a ten point happiness scale. Other workers average closer to 7.5. Other studies show remote workers take fewer sick days and can actually put in more hours a week without burning out.

Working from home gives us the freedom to fill our days as we see fit which gives us a wide open schedule. This is nice but, without some form of organization, it can lead to stress and distraction. We can end up wasting time and energy deciding what to do and when to do it.

This can be avoided by making a plan for how to approach your working hours.

You can create a ritual to replace your commute. Maybe start the day with a short walk or mindful meditation, and end the day with journaling or picking up the kids up from school as a closing activity.

How about starting each day with a workout and devoting the evenings to friends and family? The point is that, with well thought out goals, you’ll have a target to reach for when organizing your professional path.

Some say working from home can seem isolating, but it doesn’t have to be. With some effort and planning, a remote workspace can remain a close and collaborative community. It’s true that sharing a physical space makes socializing easier, however, we now have plenty of technology to create the “virtual watercooler” and even re-create typical team-building activities in the digital world.

You can schedule a video-cocktail hour or virtual dinner party so you can talk to colleagues in a more informal setting. We should not be afraid to get creative.

By adopting simple strategies like finding a daily routine and checking in with colleagues regularly, it’s possible to stay productive, connected, and ambitious while working remotely.

The History of Happiness

 

I say you should never take happiness for granted. However, there are countless fascinating perspectives to be found in its long and thought-provoking history.

Granted, the emotions of fear, love, hate and, of course, happiness are the most basic human emotions. They are doubtlessly central to what it means to be human.

It’s interesting that we didn’t always regard happiness as something natural or even human! Long ago, happiness was seen as something from the gods, and it was definitely better not to be messed around with.

We are in debt to the great minds of history. They developed our modern conception of happiness, transforming it from something mysterious and arbitrary into something to be pursued!

It wasn’t until the city of Athens was democratized in the fifth century BCE that people began dreaming of a happy life that they could influence. Prior to the downfall of the Persian Empire, people thought happiness was out of their power. With all the misery at the time — poverty, inferior medical technology, political suppression and so on — happiness seemed better left to the gods.

After the empire’s defeat, Athens began to blossom. Now a democracy, people began experiencing a new freedom — inspiring them to believe they may have some influence over their happiness.

Socrates and his student Plato believed that people could have more control over their lives, and thus their happiness. they argued that it wasn’t just up to fate, luck or the gods. It was up to the people themselves. To them, happiness was the ultimate goal, far greater than mere earthly satisfactions. Longing for happiness was a natural human tendency,

Aristotle saw things a little differently. He believed that we must look to the world; only there could we unearth our role as humans and the true role of human happiness.

The “Dark Ages” were so called because they sat between the “light” of the Roman Empire and the European Renaissance. But some historians say it was dark because everyone was so grumpy and miserable. During these times, many people had a negative outlook on both life and the concept of happiness. Full of despair, they felt trapped in their own bodies, which frequently caused them pain. It’s not at all surprising that, during this time, the Black Death obliterated almost a third of Europe’s population.

By the fifteenth century, people began to lighten up and started philosophising about life and happiness.

By the middle of the eighteenth century, most people viewed happiness as a natural light, and this is where our modern notion that everyone has a right to happiness stems from.

Drafted by Thomas Jefferson, the American Declaration of Independence states that it’s a self-evident truth that everyone has certain unalienable rights, including the right to the pursuit of happiness. The prevailing belief was that everyone was on their own in the journey toward happiness.

Ben Franklin used wine to illustrate his point, saying that God had given us the opportunity to grow happiness all by ourselves, for example, by cultivating wine. I’ll drink to that!

I still say we all have a say in our happiness. If you’re not feeling happy, go out and change that. Having a bad day? Eat some chocolate! Drink some wine!

Living Gratefully

I think we can all agree that all of us want to be happy. However, happiness means different things to different people.

Some say that in order to have happiness, you must have gratefulness. Some say it is the other way around.

There are many people who have everything that it would take to be happy and are NOT happy — because they want something else or more of the same. I know people who have lots of misfortune; misfortune that I would not want to have — and yet they are deeply happy. They radiate happiness. Why? Because they are grateful.

Therefore, it is not happiness that makes us grateful. It is gratefulness that makes us happy.

What do I mean by gratefulness? And how does it work? We all know from our own experience how this goes. We experience something that is freely given and valuable to us. We didn’t ask for it or work for it. It is freely given. Gratefulness spontaneously rises in our hearts. Happiness spontaneously rises in our hearts. That’s how gratefulness happens.

The key to all this is that we should not only experience this once in a while. We cannot only have grateful experiences. We can be people who LIVE gratefully. Grateful LIVING is the thing.

How can we live gratefully? By experiencing and becoming aware that every moment is a given moment. It’s a gift! It is freely given to us, valuable to us and we have no guarantee that another moment might be given to us. And yet, that’s the most valuable thing that can be given to us — this moment with all the opportunity that it contains.

What’s really valuable is the opportunity. Opportunity is the gift within every gift. We say that “opportunity knocks only once” , and yet, every moment is a new gift! If you miss the opportunity of this moment, another moment will be given to us. We can avail ourselves of this opportunity or we can miss it.

In essence, we hold the master key to our own happiness in our own hands. Moment by moment, we can be grateful for this gift.

Does that mean that we can be grateful for everything? Certainly not. We cannot be grateful for violence, for war, for oppression, for exploitation. On a personal level we cannot be grateful for the loss of a friend, for unfaithfulness, for bereavement.

Even when we are confronted with something that is terribly difficult, we can rise to the occasion and respond to the opportunity that is given to us. If you analyze it, more often than not what is given to us is the opportunity to enjoy and we miss it because we are rushing through life and not stopping to see the opportunity.

Once in a while, something very difficult is given to us. When this difficulty occurs, it is a challenge to rise to that opportunity. We are given opportunities to suffer, to learn, to stand up for what we believe. Those that make something out of those opportunities are the ones that we admire, that make something out of life. Those who fail….get another opportunity. We always get another opportunity. That is a wonderful richness of life.

How can each of us find a method for living gratefully?

It’s actually what we were taught as children when we were taught to cross the street. Stop, look, go.

How often do we stop? We rush through life. We miss the opportunity because we don’t stop. We have to get quiet and build stop signs into our lives.

The next thing is to look. Open your eyes, ears, nose and all your senses to this wonderful richness that is given to us. That is what life is all about — to enjoy what is given to us. We can also open our hearts for the opportunity to help others. To make others happy because nothing makes us happier than to make all of us happy.

When we open our heart to the opportunities, the opportunities invite us to do something — that is when we go. Go and do whatever life offers you in that present moment.

There is a wave of gratefulness because people are becoming aware of how this can change our world. If you’re grateful, you’re not fearful. If you’re not fearful, you’re not violent.

If you are grateful, you act out of a sense of “enough” and not a sense of scarcity and you’re willing to share.

If you’re grateful, you enjoy the differences between people and you’re respectful to everybody and that changes this power pyramid under which we live.

People are becoming aware that a grateful world is a happy world. We all have the opportunity to stop, look, go and transform.

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