A Journey of Perseverance

Late one evening in 2009 I was doing a Google search (I don’t really remember what it was for now) and I stumbled upon an ancient route across northern Spain that was gaining popularity as a walking route for hiking enthusiasts. In those days, I was not, in any way, a hiking enthusiast or even nearly athletic in any sense of the word. But for some reason, it intrigued me and sparked my interest. I didn’t get very far in researching it that evening. It was late and I found the search results I was seeking and went on with my evening.

A year later, my husband and I turned on Netflix for the first time and the movie being featured was “The Way” with Martin Sheen and Emilio Estevez. Without any inkling of what it was about, I felt compelled to watch it and very soon after elated to find out it was about the Camino de Santiago — the route across northern Spain that had come up in my search a year before.

The Camino De Santiago is known in English as The Way of St. James among other names. It is a network of walking trails/roads serving pilgrimage to the shrine of the apostle Saint James the Great in the Cathedral of Santiago de Compostela in Galicia in northwestern Spain, where tradition has it that the remains of the saint are buried (see map). Today, many people follow these routes as a form of spiritual path or retreat for their spiritual growth. It is also popular with hiking and cycling enthusiasts and organized groups.

The Way, or the route to Santiago De Compostela, was declared the first European Cultural Route by the Council of Europe in 1987. It was also named one of UNESCO’s World Heritage Sites. Since the 1980’s the route has attracted a growing number of modern-day international pilgrims.

The French Way (Camino Frances) is the most popular of the routes. It runs from Saint-Jean-Pied-de-Port on the French side of the Pyrenees to Roncesvalles on the Spanish side before making its way through to Santiago de Compostela through the major cities of Pamplona, Logrono, Burgos and Leon. This route takes approximately 4 weeks to walk and is approximately 750 km/500 miles.

Aside from “The Way” being a beautifully depicted film with breathtaking scenery, I instinctively knew I had to go there. But there were obstacles. To name a few; my husband had just been diagnosed with terminal cancer, I had a full-time job, and was facing some difficult times ahead on the home front. A walk across Spain was not anywhere in my horizon.

But, in those days, I was just learning that the Universe has a sense of humor.

Fast forward to 2016. I was living with my mother after my husband’s passing and convinced her to get Netflix. What pops up as the featured movie? You guessed it, The Way. By then, having lived 56 years on this earth, I no longer believed in coincidences. So I treated myself to this fine film once more, enjoying it much even more this time. More so because my Mom was watching it for the first time and found it fascinating.

This sparked what would be the first of many lively conversations between my Mom and me. I backtracked with her to the night I “accidentally” came across this route on that Google search and how I felt about it to the time I saw the movie and how I had felt I had to go there. What I wasn’t expecting was the question she asked me; “What are you waiting for?”

Those who have walked the Camino de Santiago say that “your Camino starts on the day you start preparing for it “. This was certainly true for me.

During the 24 months that followed, I lived in a new reality. There was much to research, prepare and train for a project like this. Since I was not able to take 4 weeks off work, I decided to start walking in Leon, Spain — about the halfway point — 300 km/184 miles from the destination of Santiago de Compostela. It was a route that combined different paths that would allow me to get to see the great variety of possibilities that the Camino de Santiago had to offer.

I was referred to the South Florida Chapter of American Pilgrims on the Camino — a local support group of experienced “Peregrinos” or Pilgrims who welcomed me, a “first timer”, and many other “veterans” of the Camino and provided mentorship while going on walks together at different Florida locations on the second Sunday of every month. I am infinitely grateful for these folks, many of which I now consider friends, for their advice and assistance throughout my preparation and all the way up to the day I left for my Camino.

In addition to walking with the group on a monthly basis, I walked a total of 15–20 miles per week consistently for over the course of a year. Sometimes I trained on bridges and multi-level parking lots to simulate hills. During the month before I was to leave, I walked with my backpack on to get used to the weight. My backpack contained only the necessary items I would need — a change of clothes (planned to wash my clothes each day, quick dry underwear, a microfiber towel, sandals for the shower and the afternoon and minimal toiletries). It weighed (as recommended) no more than 10% of my body weight (13 lbs.). I was planning to walk it like the original pilgrims — carrying everything in my backpack and sleeping at “albergues” (communal hostels) along the way.

Finally, on a late August evening, after 15 hours of combined travel (flight, bus & taxi), I arrived at my first albergue in Leon, Spain and began my Camino the following morning. I felt excitement tinged with uncertainty about what lay ahead on this trail.

That first day taught me that, as much as I prepared physically, I was unprepared for the impact this journey would have on me. I had never been able to understand total physical collapse — something that is within my experience now. I posted in Facebook every night in order to form a chronological electronic diary of the journey.

And so I went on like this for 14 days; gathering my belongings and walking out into the predawn darkness for another day of 13–15 miles walking and ready to face my fate for the rest of the day. Each day I sauntered through a still and serene universe and always the protective presence of the mountains. Each afternoon I would arrive at a different albergue in a different town, stupefied with fatigue and hit the rickety aluminum bunk bed like a dead fish. I will always be grateful for the kind and generous nature of the “simple people” who attended the albergues in this part of Spain.

Day after day, I meandered alternately through woods and across fields. There were entire days when there was little trace of the scent of humankind. Then there were days that I shared the Camino with other pilgrims, passing each other like ships in the night. The rhythmic pounding of our staffs hitting the ground, as if an invisible conductor was keeping the beat. Day after day pilgrims share bedrooms, bathrooms, hopes and fears, joys and sorrows with complete strangers, and a comfortable intimacy develops.

I developed a deep appreciation for the beautiful, diverse landscape of northern Spain, walking through forests so dense that daylight turned into night and felt amazingly mystical. When I was in the mountains, the top of hills around me stood out as islands in the mist of puffy white clouds.

Through the heat and the chill, the mountains and valleys and the gentle, restorative mist, this journey was a rigorous as it was magnificent.

When I reached the fabled city of Santiago de Compostela on the 14th day of my journey, I experienced a profound sense of loss knowing it had come to an end. I will always be grateful for this remarkable adventure. The Camino will always be a deeply engrained part of me. With every step, I was practicing the art of being alive. I will treasure those days and hope to be back someday.

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Soulmates...Love at First Memory

A few years ago, I came across someone — by order of the Universal source — that elicited an intense feeling of love in me. Their sheer presence struck a strong chord of familiarity and I felt an uncontrollable draw towards them. I was sure I had never met this person before in my life, yet I instantly recognized them. It was soul recognition.

This experience set me into a tailspin of research. I learned that If you’ve ever felt like that about a person, then you might have a past life soulmate connection with them. It doesn’t matter if you’ve spent a couple of moments with them, you still feel as if you’ve travelled with them through the jungle of life.

What is a soulmate? The term “soulmate” may or may not ring true with you. A soulmate is someone with whom you shared a deep and profound connection with in another life. It’s someone whom you loved unconditionally and who loved you unconditionally. Without trying to sound too corny, a soulmate is someone who makes you feel “whole”.

It is possible to come across soulmates among everyday people we come across. People who change our lives just by being in it. People who enter and suddenly there’s a before and after in us from their presence alone. They could be a partner, a parent, a sibling or a friend that has never left. The point is, once this connection is found, it stays there. Regardless of who this person might be when we find them, we are never the same again.

Have you ever met someone with whom you immediately felt a strong connection? Despite the fact that you’re strangers, you just have a feeling that you know this person, like you’ve met somewhere before. According to psychics, most of us have past life connections with the people in our lives, as well as our pets.

So, why do soulmates from past lives suddenly appear in our lives? One of the reasons is to give us an opportunity for eternal bliss. Another one is to teach us important lessons that drive us to a better understanding of ourselves and our higher self. It is said that soulmates have the divine purpose of waking us up. If they were your soulmate in one of your previous lives, and your reunion with them in the material world can awaken the experiences of a past life or many lives, that was spent with them.

Meeting someone from your “soul group” will typically cause a reaction in you. Your reaction to them can either be good or bad. Without really knowing why, you can either really like or dislike someone when you meet them for the first time. Regardless of what your reaction to meeting a past life connection will be, it’s never going to be neutral.

Experiencing the feeling of love at first sight is a “powerful sign” that you had a past life with someone. Psychic medium, Vincent Genna, MSW says “There is no such thing as love at first sight — it’s actually love at first memory”.

There are people who set out to manifest their soulmate. There are many methods available in books and online these days to accomplish this. Every moment of every day, we are sending out energetic signals that are felt by the people around us. This explains why a desperate person draws to himself or herself more desperation, while a person who is already fulfilled becomes a magnet for greater fulfillment. 

According to Arielle Ford, author of “The Soulmate Secret”, those who have successfully manifested their soulmates did so by finding a healthy balance between intending and allowing; between doing and being.

For me, the experience of meeting my soulmate is one I still struggle to put into words, but I remember it with complete clarity. Although we have not seen each other again, I instinctively know someday we will. I firmly believe that no one is brought into my life by accident, we all meet for a reason. It has allowed me to advance as a human being, taught me valuable lessons, and assisted me in my spiritual journey.

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The 50-Year-Old Marathon Woman

Those who know me well know that I am the most unathletic person they ever knew. So how in the world did I end up running my first half marathon at age fifty?

It all started the one early August evening when I had some friends over for dinner. After a glass of wine or two, they mentioned they had registered and were training to run the Miami Half Marathon the following January. These news shocked me given I didn’t know either one of them to be a runner. Even more shocking was the fact that they were both 65 years of age.

Neither one of them fit the image of the ideal athlete or the “runner’s body” for that matter. They didn’t seem to be overweight but hardly looked to be in shape to run 13.5 miles without stopping. Still, they were starting a training plan the following week and seemed very motivated about the event.

Many runners sign up to achieve a personal best or keep their New Year’s resolutions in check. For this type of person, the motivation is simple in their head: complete the marathon alive.

I had just turned 50 so I was starting to notice the first subtle changes in my metabolism; the loss of muscle, bone and fat under the skin — along with changes in collagen and elastin — was making fine lines and wrinkles more dramatic. Aging and inactivity were leading to achy joints because of the wearing down of cartilage, the loss of lubricating joint fluid and weaker muscles.

As the evening wore on, my intrigue increased, and it started to make sense. I wasn’t getting any younger and my body was not going to stay the same. At some point I would have to do something to stay in shape. The notion of appreciating and accepting our own body image and personal achievements is a struggle for a great number of people. I was no exception. And I love a challenge. The following morning, I signed up.

Completing a marathon is something most of us can only dream of. It’s a once in a lifetime goal and for some, a bucket list achievement. In the case of a half marathon, 13.1 miles of demanding course pushes you to the very edge both physically and mentally.

You have to be focused . Those who are focused won’t let anything stand between themselves and their end goal. Signing up for a marathon is one thing, but focused runners have specific aims and goals. For them, it’s not just the taking part that counts.

You have to prepare. A marathon requires intricate planning and preparation. It’s not the type of event where you can just show up and run. Most runners follow a strict diet and running schedule, knowing that when they turn up they will be in prime condition ready to race.

You have to be brave. They might not know it, but marathon runners are the bravest personalities. A marathon is one of the toughest challenges a human can put themselves through, so each runner should celebrate their huge efforts.

Two weeks later, believing in my heart of hearts that I was both focused and brave, I began a beginner’s training program to prepare for their first 13.1-mile race. I learned that in choosing the half marathon, you are choosing the most popular race distance in America. According to Running USA, 2 million runners did a half marathon last year. That is four times the number of the half million who ran full marathons. After consulting with my doctor, she agreed with me that, at my age, the full marathon would be “overkill”.

I should begin by pointing out that the training schedule assumes you have the ability to run 3 miles. That wasn’t the case for me, but I decided to go ahead with it. That’s one of the things I was brave about.

The first week of training began on a Tuesday with a 3 mile run (half walk, half run for me), 2 miles cross-training (bike ride for me) on Wednesday, another 3 mile run on Thursday, rest on Friday, 30 minutes cross training on Saturday leading up to a 4 mile run on Sunday morning and rest on Monday. This schedule repeated itself for a total of 12 weeks, increasing a mile for each activity every 2 or 3 weeks leading up to a 10K (6 mile) race on the 9th Sunday. By the 11th Sunday, I ran 10 miles (with some intermittent walking). The following week, there were 2 rest days before the half marathon event on the 12th Sunday.

There is a resiliency that is necessary here. Marathon runners almost always come across hurdles, be it injuries or unexpected illness throughout their training. Resilient people are a special breed. They run through the burst blisters, shin splints and pains. They keep their head up and do anything to get to the finish line.

Needless to say; and especially at my age, I had weekly dates with an ice pack and a foam roller. This was also a grueling schedule for someone working full time. But, I got into great shape and regular training improved my goal setting, organizational skills, eating habits and discipline in the workplace and outside it.

A marathon can be a rollercoaster of emotions, both during training and on race day. But come the finish line that feeling of success and accomplishment was one I’ve never felt before. While I swore afterwards ’never again’, that one marathon has led me to 3 more so far.

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Financial Serenity

I was recently asked the following question that sent me on a bit of a “wild goose chase”.

What does abundance mean to me?

So, I decided to start with the basics.

According to Oxford dictionary, abundance means “a very large quantity of something”. This brought up another question; is it necessary to have a large quantity of anything?

And yet another question; do I have everything I need right now?

And another; what about my wants?

Very few of us have everything we want, and our wants can sometime seem all-consuming. Our perceptions become confused and exaggerated by a mass media that idolizes beautiful, larger than life people and expensive objects. It isn’t easy to be clear about what it is we need to live a simple, authentic life.

A great majority of us are craving for something more in our lives. But I ask myself, do I really think I can find the solution on the pages of a glossy magazine or on the silver screen?

It seems to me that if we are to live happy, creative, and fulfilled lives, it is necessary to distinguish between our wants and our needs. It is unfortunate that most of us cannot make the distinction. And we wonder why we have a feeling of lack?

We should make peace with the fact that we can’t have everything we want. Because it’s more important to have everything we need. When we were children, we felt content when our essential needs were met

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I decided to be bold and ask myself; what is it I really need to make me happy? I suspect the answers to this critical question will be different for each of us. For a lot of us it is a matter of money and for others it is a matter of perspective.

I ask that you look inside yourself today and have a glance at your life. Are your basic needs met? Do you have a home? Food on the table? Clothes to wear? Is there a paycheck coming in? Do you have any dreams? Do you have your health? Can you walk, talk, see the beauty around you? Listen to music that inspires your soul or makes your feet want to boogie? Do you have family and friends whom you love and who love you?

Some of us think we yearn for financial security but, in fact, we yearn for financial serenity. Some of us may look at the “ledger” of our lives and determine we are very rich.

At the end of the day, I concluded that my net worth cannot possibly be determined just by the size of my checking account balance. Can yours?

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The Magic of Mindfulness

We all know that physical exercise is good for our health, but our minds can benefit from exercise too. This is where mindfulness come in.

Mindfulness is the awareness we gain when we pay attention to our feelings and emotions, or toward our immediate environment.

Mindfulness is about changing our mindset.

As we redirect our attention inward, we notice our negative habits. Like making snap judgements, criticizing ourselves, or seeking to control everything around us. By giving ourselves the gift of awareness, mindfulness helps us change these habits, and encourages us to be more open-minded, more accepting, and more receptive to the ever-changing world now we live in.

Practicing mindfulness helps you to stop dwelling on the past, or mentally racing ahead to the future.

Practice #1: Mindful Breathing; you can do this anytime, anywhere. Make it your “go-to” exercise when you feel your mind wandering, or when everyday life throws a curveball at you and you need to calm down quickly. Just stop whatever you’re doing and redirect your focus to your breath; notice the feeling in your nose as you draw in air, to the sensation in your chest as it rises with your breath, and then falls again.

Practice #2: The Body Scan; pay attention to the sensations in your body. Start by focusing on your feet, and slowly more your focus up your body, ending with the crown of your head. Is there any part of you aching, tingling, feeling hot or cold? By taking notice of these physical sensations, you’ll also become aware of any emotions you are experiencing.

For example, if your stomach is clenched, it most likely means you are experiencing worry or fear. When you get insight into your emotions, you can use this heightened awareness to make more meaningful choices — choices that bring you closer to the life you actually want to live, and the kind of person you want to be.

Practice #3: Loving-Kindness Meditation; Try this exercise, focus on someone you know and hold them in your mind. Imagine that this person is wishing you well. Next imagine yourself returning their warm, loving wishes. Silently wish them happiness, peace, and love. Finish the exercise by wishing these good things for yourself as well. Research has shown that loving-kindness meditation increases our compassion for both ourselves and others.

Final Practice: STOP; this is especially helpful in high stress situations. You guessed it, it is an acronym.

The S stands for stop, because the first step in any high stress situation should be to just pause and recognize that your emotions need some space.

The T is for take a breath, as this will help you calm down and call your attention back to the present moment.

The O is for observe your direct experience. Take a few seconds to examine how you are feeling, by noticing the sensations in your body, your emotions, and your thoughts.

The P stands for proceed with kindness. In the midst of this difficult moment, think about how you can be kind to yourself. This can be as simple as calling a friend or just going for a walk.

You can have a mindful morning by practicing gratitude and meditation.

By the time your feet hit the floor in the morning, you probably already have your game face on, mentally strategizing for success. Sound familiar? There’s a better way.

If you really want to boost your productivity during the day, try to focus your first morning thoughts on gratitude. Take a few moments while you’re still lying in bed and think of all the things, you’re grateful for. This could be as simple as the fact that you are still alive and have lived to see another day.

Mindfulness helps you become a better communicator.

When you listen mindfully, you focus all your attention on what’s being said to you. When we’re talking to other people, it can be easy to hear only what we expect to hear, not what is actually being said.

Mindful listening means being open and receptive instead of relying on your own assumptions.

Believe it or not, there is such a thing a mindful emailing! The next time you receive an upsetting email from a client or coworker, take a pause before responding and use this time nurture a sense of compassion for the email sender. Remember that, just like you, they also have needs, worries, and hopes for the future. Try to put yourself in their shoes and ask yourself what they might need from you right now. Once you’re in a kinder mindset, reply to their email in a spirit of openness and collaboration. Before you hit “send”, consider everything you have to gain just by being nice.

Writing kinder emails might not seem like much, but it can have a great impact on your clientele as well as your workplace.

Your leisure time is precious. Do not waste it.

Do you get the most out of your weekends? Most of us often waste our time off sitting on the couch and surfing the internet from our phones. Rather then seizing the day, we’re letting it slip away.

Seizing the day does not have to be complicated or expensive. It can be as simple as switching off the TV and going for a mindful walk. This involves focusing your attention on the simple act of walking. With each step, notice the stability of the ground as your feet contact it. Notice your surroundings and appreciate them. Try not to think about the things you have to do when you get home or go back to work.

 A mindful walk in nature is even better for your well-being and for your brain. Studies have found that, when you go for a walk in nature, a region of your brain called the prefrontal cortex, which is involved in planning and decision making, is less active. Walking through woodland lowers your blood pressure and reduces your levels of cortisol, the so-called “stress hormone”.

Children love it when adults share in their sense of awe and wonder of the natural world. So, if you have got a little person in your life, make plans to spend your next weekend together, enjoying the trees, the sky, and the sun on your faces.

Simple mindful practices can help you focus on the present and appreciate the fleeting moments of intimacy, joy, and serenity that only exist in the here-and-now.

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Is Sleep Better Than Medicine?

Have you ever wondered why you feel so good after a night of deep sleep? Well, a sleep switch in humans has been discovered.

In 2001, a Harvard University sleep researcher identified a group of neurons in the hypothalamus — the brain region that controls activities such as hunger and body temperature — called the sleep switch.

The state when these neurons are shutting down and we begin to fall asleep is known as hypnagogia, and the transitional state when we wake up is called hypnapompia.

It’s at these times that we “coincide with the world” and have a chance to access other dimensions or realities. Salvador Dali famously made use of this in his paintings, which were inspired by his dreams.

Thomas Edison also used these transitional states to solve problems by taking naps while holding steel balls in his hands. As he drifted off, his hands would relax and the balls would fall and wake him up, hopefully with the solution already in mind!

We all eventually succumb to sleep. You do it every night, but have you ever stopped to think what sleep really is?

Science says ‘sleep is a fluctuating state that consists of two forms — rapid eye movement (REM) and slow-wave (SW)- which alternate about five to six times a night, on average every 90 minutes.

REM sleep is named after the way our eyes move under our eyelids when we sleep. It is the most active stage of sleep, and it literally heats up the brain, making it necessary for other forms of sleep to cool it down. In REM, our dreams are vivid, active and easy to recall.

SW, on the other hand, is deep sleep characterized by synchronized brain waves that are hard to wake up from. SW is the most restorative form, and it burns fat, which explains why not sleeping enough can lead to obesity. It’s most likely our most necessary form of sleep, and while we are in it, our dreams are fragmented and difficult to remember.

Both states are characterized by two features; diminished responses to outer stimuli and the ability to wake up. These features differentiate them from other states, such as a coma.

As those of us around the age of 50 and over know, the amount of SW sleep we get decreases over time. In fact, up to a quarter of 50-year-olds and older get no SW at all! This can be a factor of aging, such as less muscle tone, less physical strength, higher body fat, thinning skin, tiredness, lower libido, memory loss and immune malfunction.

Sounds like it’s a good idea to value your sleep. As the Irish say, sleep is better than medicine!

Camino de Santiago - Details Of The Trip

It's important to note that I trained, planned & collected gear for this trip for a year before I left.  Also this trip took place August 20-September 4, 2018.

I am infinitely grateful for the folks of the South Florida Chapter of American Pilgrims on the Camino - a support group of experienced "Peregrinos" who welcomed me and many other veterans and "first timers" of the Camino who provide mentorship while going on a few miles walk at a different south Florida location on the second Sunday of every month.

Of course, much gratitude to my family and friends who put up with me talking about it during the year and followed my every step via Facebook & Instagram while I was training and on the actual  Camino.

I flew to Madrid and took an ALSA bus to Leon ( approx., 4 hour drive).  I stayed in Leon overnight and started walking the following day.  The details of each day are chronicled in this blog as well as on social media.

I brought all of my belongings in a backpack which weighed 12 Lbs when full.  I had the choice of having my backpack transported to the next location each day but decided to do it like the original Pilgrims who originally walked this path.

Economywise, this was an inexpensive trip.  The most costly item was my plane ticket to and from Madrid. The "albergues" that I stayed in averaged about 10-12 Euros per night and some included a community dinner.  Almost all the eating establishments on the Camino have a "Pilgrim Menu" which averaged at about 10 Euros for a 4 course meal.  The buses to and from Madrid were 25 Euros.

I regret not having enough time to take this journey slower and be able to absorb more detail. The scenery was breathtaking and all the places where I stopped and spent the nights were very clean and very attentive to my needs.

While I had a physically rougher time than I anticipated, it was an unforgettable experience.